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QueenVic
Yearling
United Kingdom
849 Posts |
 Posted - 07/07/2012 : 01:21:57
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Sorry to post this here :/ but im a member of any other forums and its not something i wanted to post on facebook..
But have any of you ever had counselling/therapy before?
and did it help at all?
Just wondering if its worth the money, feel like im starting to need it. |
0.1.0 Normal (Espher)
1.0.0 Snow (Midnight)
2 GALS
1 rat (Jasper)
1 very needy staffy (Coco)
Location: Ossett
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QueenVic
Yearling
United Kingdom
849 Posts |
Posted - 07/07/2012 : 01:22:30
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| *im not a member on any other forums |
0.1.0 Normal (Espher)
1.0.0 Snow (Midnight)
2 GALS
1 rat (Jasper)
1 very needy staffy (Coco)
Location: Ossett
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nickyff
Yearling
507 Posts |
Posted - 07/07/2012 : 01:42:19
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Vic- Ive had counselling in the past, with variable results; the main problem being that just about anybody can call themselves a 'counsellor' and set up business. Your best bet is to go to your GP who will be able to refer you to somebody with medical qualifications and/or proper training/experience in counselling. this of course will also not cost the exhorbitant fees that private 'counsellors' have the gall to charge.
having said that, the people you encounter even through professional channels can vary in their levels of empathy, experience and proposed solutions; a major factor in a good counselling relationship is that YOU have to feel a connection with the particular counsellor enough to trust them, and through your GP or local mental health services, you might not get much choice. Even so, I would still suggest that option as your first move. You are also welcome to mail me, if you'd like; use sweekles at hotmail dot com. I have a friend who is a qualified counsellor- I think she lives in Brighton atm, if thats anywhere mear you? mail me if you want her contact details, or just to get a bit more perspective on it.
best of luck, keep yer chin up chuck,
xxxnicky |
and you thought there was no such thing as a stupid question....
1.2.0 corns: captain haddock, sharon the tiddler and Darling Debbie. plus 0.2.0 cali kings: spot and Numpty... not forgetting the delightful Miss Lovely-Gonzalez-La-Poop apricot pueblan milk snake, and we all miss the Lodger who thought he was a cobra....
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Edited by - nickyff on 07/07/2012 01:46:01 |
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Elicia
Hatchling
222 Posts |
Posted - 07/07/2012 : 02:08:54
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It depends what the issue is. If its to get over a particular incident/specific problem then I cant comment as ive not been in that situation. I suffer from unexplained anxiety, which hits me out of the blue ive tried CBT and all sorts of therapy to no avail.
I know this sounds really stupid and im not sure how severe your problem is, but have you tried writing all your problems down? I know its really basic , but you will find that putting into words how you feel can sometimes provide you with answers and sometimes you will find that once written down some problems don't seem too bad after all. I truly believe that everyone has it within them to be their own best therapist :)
hope you are feeling better soon. x |
 
Normal Corn-Percy
Speckled King-Bumblebee |
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QueenVic
Yearling
United Kingdom
849 Posts |
Posted - 07/07/2012 : 02:18:47
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its a relationship thing.. well, Ive just been left after 3 years and had to move out of the flat and leave my dog etc.
Feeling as low as i can get pretty much and i keep feeling like im going to do something daft so I need to talk to someone.
Thanks Nicky, I need to go to the doctors to get a tetanus jab soon before college so ill ask him then.
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0.1.0 Normal (Espher)
1.0.0 Snow (Midnight)
2 GALS
1 rat (Jasper)
1 very needy staffy (Coco)
Location: Ossett
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Elicia
Hatchling
222 Posts |
Posted - 07/07/2012 : 02:26:23
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| oh no that sounds awful :( if you feel that bad then definitely see you doctor and tell them everything and see what they think ( be careful of them trying to fob you off with a prescription though as a lot of GPs tend to do!) you can email me too if you like- elicia dot bambi at hotmail dot co uk |
Normal Corn-Percy
Speckled King-Bumblebee |
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nickyff
Yearling
507 Posts |
Posted - 07/07/2012 : 03:01:25
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that point about not being fobbed off with happy-pills is a VERY good one...
don't accept anti-D tablets when your low is caused by circumstances, not chemical brain imbalance. [Sadly many GPs, being pushed for time/trying to meet targets etcetc will go for the quickest easiest option and try to give you inappropriate medication]- do not accept it- you know, as you have already identified, that you need to talk to somebody
putting tangled emotions and thoughts into language is the best way to get them into some semblance of order and sense, it clarifies for yourself what exactly you're feeling, and why etc. writing can help that, as a preliminary step- that is also a good suggestion..but needs to be followed up with human contact- do you have family/close friends nearby that you could drop in on over the weekend? (I'm assuming your GP won't be available until at least Monday)
EDIT-oops- slipped on the wrong button there....had to come back in to finish that sentence  heehee
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and you thought there was no such thing as a stupid question....
1.2.0 corns: captain haddock, sharon the tiddler and Darling Debbie. plus 0.2.0 cali kings: spot and Numpty... not forgetting the delightful Miss Lovely-Gonzalez-La-Poop apricot pueblan milk snake, and we all miss the Lodger who thought he was a cobra....
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Edited by - nickyff on 07/07/2012 03:07:35 |
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nusnakemum
Sub Adult
United Kingdom
1612 Posts |
Posted - 07/07/2012 : 06:49:20
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| Hiya sorry you are feeling rough,talking, and being with people and out and about is going to help you. I recently had a kind of breakdown (could,nt breath was in a kind of panic attack that lasted 4 months)and i was lucky enough to get hypnotherapy (i was a case study for a trainee so did,nt have to pay) and it was brilliant, like Percy said i learnt i could be my own best therapist, but it is very expensive. i was also on anti ds which did,nt seem to work and gave up on them. Try concentrating just on you and what you want and treat yourself well, try to have treatments that focus just on you, like massage, manicure or reflexology etc. and don,t forget you can always have a winge and a moan on here and then look at some hoglet pictures (always makes me smile !)xxx |
0.0.1 corn Ernest
0.1.0 leopard gecko Mrs T
1.0.0 anery Black Eyed Bill RIP Bill x
2.0.0 kids |
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Elicia
Hatchling
222 Posts |
Posted - 07/07/2012 : 11:34:54
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| The anti d thing really winds me up, most medications take a good 5-6 months to have any effect so sending a patient away with them doesn't offer any sort of support in the short term. Luckily I live in an area with very good mental health services and you can get refereed to see someone quite quickly on the NHS so its def worth chasing with your doc first, but as Nicky said talking to friends and family who are around you is a good first step. Elicia. xx |
Normal Corn-Percy
Speckled King-Bumblebee |
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Lozzy
Sub Adult
United Kingdom
1556 Posts |
Posted - 07/07/2012 : 11:39:27
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hi there QueenVic, first off im sorry your feeling this way :( but as a person that suffered depression as a result of a relationship myself i did seek counseling along with being prescribed happy pills and i can honestly say the counseling did me the world of good, im not really the sort of person to talk about my feeling and didnt really think it was the thing for me but i actually looked forward to going each week and getting things off my chest so really can reccomend it but as others have said do make sure that u check that whoever you see is actually qualified and make sure you feel comfortable with them, u may have to shop around to find someone you can open up to but i do thin its worth trying if you feel low.
Also im quite happy to talk if you feel you want to?
sorry to open up a bit here just is a topic close to my heart :)
I hope you feel better soon and do feel free to contact me if you want xxx
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0.1 CB10 Snow Cornsnake - Galaxy ~(Currently MIA)
1.0 CB11 Ultramel Anery Consnake -Orion
0.1 CB11 Lavender Cornsnake - Star
0.1 Leopard Gecko-Simo
1.1 Jack Russell-T.J and Harley (Minature)
1.1 Cats-Rascal and Dizzee
1.0 TB Horse-Mickey |
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a2c7
Hatchling
United Kingdom
320 Posts |
Posted - 07/07/2012 : 14:57:41
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I would say you need to do what's right for you. Unfortunately depression has a stigma that goes with it, but at the end of the day it's your life and I have a lot of respect for people who take control of their lives and do what's best for themselves when it comes to their health.
I was scheduled to have counselling when I was bullied at my old job. I think the thought of needing it shocked my brain back to my usual, vibrant and egotistical self. I ended up cancelling it as the feelings I'd been having had gone and I felt much happier in my life. I've since got another job and am still realising just how awful the last place I worked was and how easy it is to become depressed and even oppressed through interaction with others.
The counselling I opted for was delivered by the NHS, I was introduced to it via my GP.
I will (at some point in life) have to have a test to find out about a disease that will have a major impact on my life. Both before and after I get the test results I'll have to have counselling. I fully support the use of it and believe when a psychologist is well trained and has their patient's well being in mind then only good can come of it. |
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lupi lou
Fully Grown Corn
United Kingdom
3670 Posts |
Posted - 07/07/2012 : 21:44:02
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| like a2c7 i was refered for counselling a good few years back through my GP but i really didn't like the women who i had to see, i was fortunate that i had some really good friends who i trusted enough to talk to and open up to. things will feel bad at the moment and you've had a rough time but things will get better, like others have offered if you ever want to talk drop me an email. |
 
1.0.1 Corns
0.1.0 Dog: springer
1.0.0 Horse
0.4.0 Gerbils
2.2.0 Leopard gecko
0.2.0 Cave gecko |
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Corrah
Hatchling
United Kingdom
154 Posts |
Posted - 08/07/2012 : 20:53:21
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Queen Vic - my bro in law has just walked out on my sister after 22 years of marriage. I'm currently being my sisters counsellor it would seem. I have also seen a counsellor in the past, and I did find it helpful, but I agree if you have some good friends to talk things over with that is probably just as good.
A couple of times in my life I've been prescribed anti depressants, but to be honest, I think they just take the edge off and don't really help you face the situation or enable you to cope or get your head round it.
Hang in there and try to see the bigger picture. I now try to make the best of anything that happens whether it seems good or bad. There are always some positives you can take from it.
Wishing you luck.
C x |
1.1.3 Corn Snakes (Altivo, Millie, Peggy, Al & Fraggle)
2.1.0 Cats (Merlin, Floyd & Poppy) |
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Hanxa
Egg
United Kingdom
54 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2012 : 18:31:25
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I went through counselling for a while through the NHS and it did a world of good in a short space of time. I'm not very social so my counsellor was the ear I needed. She taught me to talk and helped me turn my views around a session at a time, giving me the tools to manage without the counselling.
But yes, since making more friends, I find that talking to them on a regular basis has the same effect. You just need someone you can really trust and feel comfortable talking to. Let them be an ear when you need them and then be an ear in return should they ever need you. It's a wonder how good a little talking can make you feel |
1.0.0 Carolina - Aspen
1.0.0 Charcoal - Shadow
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BurnedAtTheStake
Yearling
United Kingdom
915 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2012 : 18:52:27
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| Guideline at Bradford - 01274 594 594 - open 12 midday - 9 at night. Very very good and I live in Wfd and have been speaking to them for 5 years. I can recommend Jeanette and Mark especially. Good luck and all the best. xxx |
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Thorne Walker
Yearling
Canada
642 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2012 : 20:48:32
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So I've been lurking on this site for a while... and wanted to add my .02 cents...
I've been fighting mental illness (type2 rapid cycling bipolar disorder) all my adult life and as a matter of principle I Don't Take Dope.
I'm going to assume that when you say 'do something daft' you are referring to some form of self harm...
If your depressed I'm willing to bet you're not eating right or sleeping enough.. Both of those behaviours will make the depression worse.
When I start getting the inclination to step in front of a train or take the short flight from my balcony to the ground I take a regular Multivitamin, a Multi B vitamin, and 5000iu of vitamin D daily till the funk passes...
Most of the Happy Pills on the market are Selective Serotonin Re-uptake Inhibitors (SSRI).. Vitamin B6 and several Amino Acids (Tryptophan primarily) are used by your body to make Serotonin. Rather then muckin with your brain to keep it floating around longer you should ensure that you have the right raw materials to make enough of it in the first place. There are also a ton of other minerals and macro nutrients that play an important role in mental health which is why diet is so important.
MY other suggestion is to get out and join some kind of group fitness program. Exercise has clear positive effects on a whole host of mental health issues and who knows.. you might just meet some nice someone who will give you some other 'daft things' to think about (wink wink nudge nudge) :D
I would also recommend reading Living Meditation, Living Insight by Dr Thynn Thynn. Without exaggeration her book saved my life (countless times).
quote:
If you just stopped thinking for a while and sat back to reflect on your own mind, you would be surprised to realise that you are at peace. Even if you agree with me, you might argue that this peace is only temporary. So be it.
But let us look into this peaceful tranquil state, temporary or otherwise, since it is already with us - without our having to make any effort at all at being peaceful.
You were born with this peace-nature of the mind; otherwise you would not be what you are, would you? You did not run around meditating to bring about this peace to yourself: you did not learn from someone or some book to make possible this peaceful state in yourself. In other words, "you" had nothing to do with it. Peace is a natural mind-state in every one of us. Peace has been there since the day we were born and it is going to be there till the day we die. It is our greatest gift; so why do we think we have no peace of mind?
Experiencing peace is like looking at our hands. Usually, we see only the fingers - not the spaces in between. In a similar manner, when we look at the mind, we are aware of the active states, such as our running thoughts and the one-thousand-and-one feelings that are associated with them, but we tend to overlook the intervals of peace between them.
http://www.buddhanet.net/imol/livingmd.htm |
1.0.0 CB'11 Volcano Corn 'Kitty'
0.0.1 CB'11 Russian Rat Snake 'Monster'
2.0.0 CB'04 Roof Rabbits 'Baka Neko-San' and 'Usagi Neko-San'
My Setup :http://www.thecornsnake.co.uk/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=27228
The Kids: http://www.thecornsnake.co.uk/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=26248 |
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crazy JJ
Fully Grown Corn
United Kingdom
2326 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2012 : 21:11:20
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in all honesty when i went about 8yrs ago i didnt help me whatsoever infact it made me feel worse because all she wanted to do was get me back to school but not that school was my problem i was never bullied or whatever it was home life (im not guna go into detail) so no it never helped for me.
But im not one to open up at all infact thats why alot of people get mad at me but alot of the time i get it thrown back in my face so i never bother. i do however have a friend that is training to be a counsellor and i dont get to see him that often but he is brilliant he knows me more than i know myself so i think it really depends who you get to talk to but dont forget no one can help you unless you open up to them.. think ive learnt my lesson now...
I hope you feel better soon.. depression is a horriable spiral and it can take just a small knock to be completly outta control, dont think your week though cos admitting you need help is the first and biggest step and takes alot of strength just to admit that. as some other have suggested take up a hobby of some description find something that makes you happy a distraction if you will hopefully there you will find new friends.. i know it sounds easier than done but it will help.. stay in there and as contradicting as this is coming from me you need to eat and sleep or well try to... sorry to ramble lol shall shut up now i think haha!
again hope ya work something out and rememeber this should only make you stronger, i know im alot stronger now than i was a few yrs ago, i would be alien to the world if it hadnt been through my past experiences.. Depression is weey to over looked!! |
2.5 corns 2.0 cali kings 1.0 tange hondo milk 1.0 apricot pueblan milk 1.0 royal (overgrown slug) 0.1 tarantula 1.0 chinchilla chico, 0.1 goldfish tigger 0.0.4 minows 0.2 cats fudge and porsha and 0.3.2 tarantula’s that are my mummys
r.i.p to the lil ones that i and mummy have lost recently |
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nusnakemum
Sub Adult
United Kingdom
1612 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2012 : 21:35:52
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| well vicki i think you did the right thing posting on here - so many of us are behind you rooting for you to be happy and start to enjoy life again - smile x |
0.0.1 corn Ernest
0.1.0 leopard gecko Mrs T
1.0.0 anery Black Eyed Bill RIP Bill x
2.0.0 kids |
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nickyff
Yearling
507 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2012 : 22:33:23
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vic- youve not postred on this thread for a bit- i hope this means yr feeling a bit better?
if N, mail me i'll mail myphone number and we can put the world to rights, any time. (im often up stupidly l;ate, no time is a bad time)
xxxxx hope yr okay lovie |
and you thought there was no such thing as a stupid question....
1.2.0 corns: captain haddock, sharon the tiddler and Darling Debbie. plus 0.2.0 cali kings: spot and Numpty... not forgetting the delightful Miss Lovely-Gonzalez-La-Poop apricot pueblan milk snake, and we all miss the Lodger who thought he was a cobra....
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Redshift Spec
Hatchling
379 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2012 : 23:00:42
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QueenVic, I'm not going to say 'chin up' or anything like that. I've got a major depressive illness (Bi-Polar II). Never be afraid to ask for help. Sometimes just talking it through with your doctor can help. That would be where I'd start.
I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to confide in us on here :) Trust me, it does get better. Though if your feeling like you might do something daft. I'd get to a doctor, just to have a chat. They won't (well shouldn't) be condescending and are usually very empathetic. If you've got a doctor you know try and speak to him/her. I've been in a place of doing something daft. I've tried something daft, all i felt afterwards was.... well daft :p
It'll lift with time but as said its worth having a chat with your doctor. Sometimes that will be enough to help lift the shadow. If you want to chat, fire me an email wt_uk [at] hotmail -dot- com
I know I've been very 'get to your doctor', that is just my suggestion and what has worked for me. It is fully up to you and don't feel pressured to do anything you don't want to :) Chatting to us snakey lot might be all you need, a good vent!
:) |
Frank (Amel Corn 1.0)
Felicity (Flick) (Normal Het Albino BCI 0.1)
Jack (Sunglow BCI 1.0)
Maisie (Hypo het Albino BCI 0.1)
Silver (Snow Corn 0.1)
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QueenVic
Yearling
United Kingdom
849 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2012 : 15:48:43
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wow, thanks for all the replies guys :)
Im all over the place at min and I dont know how I feel any more. Not as bad as I was when i posted the OP though, so I guess thats a start.
Its nice to know that you all care, even though you've never met me |
0.1.0 Normal (Espher)
1.0.0 Snow (Midnight)
2 GALS
1 rat (Jasper)
1 very needy staffy (Coco)
Location: Ossett
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counselling/therapy
