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hiper2009
Banned

United Kingdom
2197 Posts

Posted - 07/08/2010 :  21:55:43  Show Profile  Click to see hiper2009's MSN Messenger address  Reply with Quote
My snake was very thin and sick , so I took it to the vet.
The vet took a quick look and said, Sorry, your snake
is going to die, that will be £20. I said is that all I get for £20 ?
He took the snake over to a floppy-eared rabbit, and the rabbit
pointed his ears straigt up to the ceiling ...
He took it to a Black Labrador dog, and the dog stuck out his
tongue and shook its head ...
He took it to a cat, the cat opened her eyes very wide and then
shook its head violently ...
He said, "That will be £350..... £50 for the second opinion, £75
for Lab tests and £225 for the CAT scan.



-----------------
What would you get if you crossed a new born snake with
a basketball ?
A bouncing baby boa !

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Why did the python do national service ?
He was coiled up !

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What do you call a snake who works for the governement ?
A civil serpent !

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What do you call a python with a great bedside manner ?
A snake charmer !

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What subject are snakes good at in school ?
Hiss-tory !

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What do you call a snake that informs the police ?
A grass snake !

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Why did the two boa constrictors get married ?
Because they had a crush on each other !

-----------------
Why are snakes hard to fool ?
They have no legs to pull !

-----------------
What's a python's favourite pop group ?
Squeeze !

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Which hand would you use to pick up a dangerous snake ?
Someone else's !

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What do you do if you find a poisonous snake in your toilet ?
Wait till he's finished !

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Why can't you trust snakes ?
They speak with forked tongues !

-----------------
What do you get if you cross a snake and a lego set ?
A boa constructor !

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What do snakes write at the bottom of their letters ?
With Love and Hisses !

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What kind of letters did the snake get from his admirers ?
Fang letters !

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What do you give a sick snake ?
Asp-rin !

-----------------
What did the python say to the viper ?
I've got a crush on you !

Credits : http://www.reptileallsorts.com/snakejokes.htm

0.0.0 Royal Python Het Pied 100% CB10 - Chaos
1.1.0 Brazilian Rainbow Boa CB10 - Bow/Mayhem
0.1.0 Cornsnake Amel Het Motley CB10 - Fire
1.0.0 Cornsnake Caramel Het Motley CB09 - Whisky
1.0.0 Cornsnake Snow Het Stripe CB07 - Romeo - R.I.P

1.0.0 Super Golden Labrador Dog CB02 - Bailey


Wish List:
1.2.0 Royal Python - Pastel , Pinstripe , Lesser.

kdlang
Fully Grown Corn

United Kingdom
3556 Posts

Posted - 07/08/2010 :  22:02:11  Show Profile  Click to see kdlang's MSN Messenger address  Reply with Quote
lol. made me smile - cant be bad lol

4.1.0 corns - Izzy (Carolina) Alice (Amel) Peanut (Butter Motley) Swayze (Ghost) Carmellia (Butter Motley)
0.1.0 cat - Kizzy
1.0.0 Dog - Dobbie
Location - Chesterfield, Derbyshire

www.support-dogs.org.uk
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hiper2009
Banned

United Kingdom
2197 Posts

Posted - 07/08/2010 :  22:06:01  Show Profile  Click to see hiper2009's MSN Messenger address  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by kdlang

lol. made me smile - cant be bad lol



Came accross this and it made me chukkle xD

0.0.0 Royal Python Het Pied 100% CB10 - Chaos
1.1.0 Brazilian Rainbow Boa CB10 - Bow/Mayhem
0.1.0 Cornsnake Amel Het Motley CB10 - Fire
1.0.0 Cornsnake Caramel Het Motley CB09 - Whisky
1.0.0 Cornsnake Snow Het Stripe CB07 - Romeo - R.I.P

1.0.0 Super Golden Labrador Dog CB02 - Bailey


Wish List:
1.2.0 Royal Python - Pastel , Pinstripe , Lesser.
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lee2308
The Corn Snake Moderator

United Kingdom
3348 Posts

Posted - 07/08/2010 :  23:03:27  Show Profile  Click to see lee2308's MSN Messenger address  Reply with Quote
Too late,most of been posted already,tut pinching my vet joke(which i nicked) lol http://www.thecornsnake.co.uk/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=2189&whichpage=2&SearchTerms=black,labrador



Edited by - lee2308 on 07/08/2010 23:05:24
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hillzi
The Lost boy.

United Kingdom
3984 Posts

Posted - 07/08/2010 :  23:07:04  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Heard them all before!
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eeji
The Morph Master

United Kingdom
4335 Posts

Posted - 08/08/2010 :  00:13:34  Show Profile  Visit eeji's Homepage  Reply with Quote
the mad thing is though, at some vets thats probably how it happens! :D


Forum - Guide to Cornsnake Morphs - Punnett Square Calculator - Breeder Directory
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crazy JJ
Fully Grown Corn

United Kingdom
2326 Posts

Posted - 08/08/2010 :  00:49:08  Show Profile  Click to see crazy JJ's MSN Messenger address  Reply with Quote
defo put a smile on my face anyways :)

yup i cud just imagine that happening at a vets lol :D :P

2.5 corns 2.0 cali kings 1.0 tange hondo milk 1.0 apricot pueblan milk 1.0 royal (overgrown slug) 0.1 tarantula 1.0 chinchilla chico, 0.1 goldfish tigger 0.0.4 minows 0.2 cats fudge and porsha and 0.3.2 tarantula’s that are my mummys
r.i.p to the lil ones that i and mummy have lost recently
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BurnedAtTheStake
Yearling

United Kingdom
915 Posts

Posted - 08/08/2010 :  14:37:16  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
First snake keeper: I've got lots of corns!

Second snake keeper: Well, stop wearing those stilettos, dear!
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